Strange Dream

I had a weird dream the other night.

I dreamt that I got myself pregnant.

Not like a Virgin Mary miracle pregnant. Or an Ambien-induced accidentally-slept-with-the-neighbor pregnant. Much stranger than those.

My left ovary was actually an undescended testicle, and had been undetected for my whole life until I went to the doctor with pregnancy symptoms. Anyway, I got myself pregnant through some miracle of intersex science.

I remember thinking "How am I going to raise a baby on my own, and even without child support?" but decided to keep it because how many people in the world can get themselves pregnant? At the very least I could get my own TLC show.

But then I started getting used. The media was harassing me. Scientists were exploiting me. Crazy Evangelists started threatening me because I was allegedly carrying the Anti-Christ.

So, I got myself a lawyer, and then I woke up!